ZACH MADE ME DO THIS

devongreen:

dashdrive:

this oatmeal has god damn dinosaur eggs in it and then when you cook it THE DINOSAURS FUCKIN HATCH IM SO PUMPED

Was this post made in 1996?

bagmilk:

dslubes:

macintush:

"BLESS THIS POST"

shut up

"WHY DOESNT THIS HAVE MORE NOTES"

shut up

"ITS BACK"

shut up

"reblogging again"

shut up

"this"

shut up

"finally someone said it"

shut up

finally someone said it omg bless this post i’m reblogging again because it’s back why doesn’t it have more notes omg

guinness world records man: sir you have done nothing but do pushups from this one spot for 20 years with no rest. what drives you?
me, still doing pushups: i wanna push this planet out of the idiot solar system and into the horrifying abyss of the unknown universe and this is the only way I know how
world records man, in awe: [drops everything and instantly begins doing pushups next to me]
marsretros:

anusvevo:

when you’re running late & getting ready but bae wants some before you leave

LMFAO

marsretros:

anusvevo:

when you’re running late & getting ready but bae wants some before you leave

LMFAO

moonemojii:

When someone lies to you but you already know the truth
image

sofapizza:

tastefullyoffensive:

Coming soon, to a theatre near you. [bitfiend]

IN A WORLD

where only MS Paint has survived.

sexadvicegoddess:

sarcasticlittlefuckk:

standard

I am crying I love this too much

dickpong:

dickpong:

THIS STRANGER JUST OPENED MY FRONT DOOR PETTED MY DOG SAW ME AND LEFT

i just met my step-brother for the first time

dasfreefree:

i couldn’t make this up even if i tried

dasfreefree:

i couldn’t make this up even if i tried